One thing we pride ourselves on, collectively as The Girls, is experiencing new things. We enjoy traveling to new places, tasting various cuisines, frequenting the newest, hottest spots in NYC, etc. You name it, we will try it. When I jumped off a cliff into the ocean in Jamaica, I thought that was one of the coolest things EVER. When I went snowboarding for the first time, it was both exhilarating and scary as shit. When I traveled to Europe for the first time with my mother, I finally felt "cultured". Point blank, doing things I have never done before and witnessing situations I have never experienced is something I strive for.
But Lordy, be.....
No experience is more emotional, stressful, scary, exhilirating and/or full of hope as witnessing the miracle of birth. Never in a million years would I have expected to be in a delivery room, other than mine when I finally decide to have children. Never in a million years would I think after watching countless episodes of A Baby Story that I would be right in the battle of giving birth. I did not expect this, but it was one of the most rewarding, exciting and amazing experiences I have ever had.
Care Bear Girl finally gave birth to a beautiful 8 pound, 6 ounce baby girl. Homegirl came out with the healthiest set of lungs to let the world know, "I AM HERE !!" Based upon the birth plan that Care Bear sent to all of The Girls, I was NOT supposed to be in the delivery room, but some kind of way it just happened. Many of The Girls were out of town, the baby came early and I was assigned the task of keeping everyone informed of Care Bear's status. I hate to liken it to Sports Broadcasters, but that is exactly how I felt. I gave play by plays of everything down to how many centimeters she was dialated and how inadequate I felt to even be in the room.
I have NEVER seen anything like that in my life. It wasn't so much the actual visualization of the baby coming through the birth canal and making her way into the world. That was more of the calm in the storm. The action was witnessing my dear friend in pain and not being able to do anything about it. As soon as I walked into the room and witnessed her battling contractions, I emailed The Girls to ask them, "What can I do to help ? I feel so helpless." Care Bear was on the bed, on all fours, rotating her head around, breathing hard, grunting, calling on Jesus and telling us to "TALK TO ME !!! TALK ME THROUGH THIS". The father of the baby was right there, being very supportive. He would rub her back, rub her head, bend down to be eye level with her and instruct her to breathe. He managed to bring a sense of calm to her when she was in so much pain. He also broke down and cried from the site of seeing the woman he loved in so much pain and the rush of emotions knowing that in about 5 minutes, he was about to be a first time father. It was simply beautiful.
I played my part in the back of the room. My back was pressed up against the window, my index finger was on the flash button of the camera. Through the hustle and bustle of the night's events, neither Care Bear nor the father managed to think about capturing the birth. Auntie Party Girl to the rescue. One thing I don't miss is a good picture.
Once we realized it was time for her to push, a rush of physicians, assistants and nurses entered the room. I stepped back even further. Thank GOD the father was positioned so I was not privy to the actual site of the baby coming out. I was only 3 feet from them, but as long as I didn't see the actual "action", I felt as comfortable as being in the waiting room. Well, that was until said father's arms got tired and he stepped a little too far to the left....and ... WHAM !!! Too much anybody without children should see.
Care Bear is the sweetest, most polite person amongst The Girls, but I still found it quite amusing that intertwined with her primal grunts, yells and sighs, she still managed to say "Please" when requesting that the physician "not touch her like that again....Please". She only managed to curse once, and she did that in Spanish. Oh, and did I mention she refused an epidural and did this thing naturally ?
After the baby came, we all hugged, cried, took pictures, called and emailed family. I was overcome by a sense of being just wonderfully grateful. Grateful that God blessed this family with a successful birth with no issues. Grateful that we had a new addition to our New York family and grateful that my friend allowed me into this personal space to witness this. It was simply one of the most amazing things I have ever experienced in life. I hope to have the same poise and strength when my time comes.
Until then, I will be the best Honorary Auntie I can be as I add another sweet baby girl to my list of nieces and nephews.
Did I mention the baby already has her "Pooch Pose" down ? :)
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