The Evil Spirit

It haunts you when you least expect it....

It takes days, months, even years to get it out of your system...

It wreaks havoc on your thoughts, plans, goals for as long as you let it...

It loves you, it hates you, it makes you crazy, stupid and the total opposite of the reasonable adult your parents raised...

It... is the the EVIL SPIRIT...

None of that exorcist, Linda Blair stuff going on...per se. However, the evil spirit is that man....ooooohhhhhh that man. The evil spirit is that man that both you and your girls knew was NOT the one for you. The evil spirit is that man who had you doing stupid shit, like actually believing the ridiculous lies that always came out of his mouth. The evil spirit is that man, who no matter how many times you have sworn him off, he ALWAYS seems to call, text or literally just show up after you have had that third cocktail and your Lucifer Lutes are raging.

MAN, I have had about 2 true to life evil spirits. The #1 spot of evil spirits is still to this day held by a man I affectionately called "Cocky Fine Bastard". This man...WOOOO... this man. CFB was just that. He was cocky, he was fine and he was a bastard. He made my 20's so thrilling. He would throw limes from across the bar if he saw any man talking to me. He would buy over 100 roses from the "Rose Man" in the club when I wouldn't speak to him. He would dance on stage at any given event like he was Tupac. Did I mention how fine he was ?

All this excitement, drama and pure sexual tension was so grand back then...but now... I would run for the HILLS if he ever came near me. Thank God for being stupid in your 20's, so you can learn from those mistakes and strive for wisdom in your 30's and beyond.

The funny thing is ALL of THE GIRLS have evil spirits. There was "Nolan", the professional football player who broke my girl's heart, got married to someone else without telling her, and then broke into my girl's apartment when she would no longer talk to him. The cops were called and charges were filed !! Oh, let's not forget "Shawn", the unassuming nerdy looking Casanova who had women all across the U.S., one of whom my girl had the pleasure of meeting by accident at Mi Luna. The most consistent evil spirit of them all is "Joshua", the mean preacher man....man, I can't even talk about him without getting upset. He is the king of popping up to wreak havoc on one of THE GIRLS. The thing about evil spirits is that they do NOT go quietly. You would think marriage would keep them away...HAIL NAWL.... you would think that police reports and restraining orders would make them give it up...AWW NAWW.... you would think that 5+ years of not seeing you would make the memories go away...not on their part.

My biggest lesson learned with the evil spirits was .... it was all fun and games in your 20's. To put up with some of the shenanigans those fools displayed at this age would be downright ridiculous.

So ladies, look around.... are you still entertaining an evil spirit ?

In the words of Ray Parker, Jr. "Who You Gonna Call ???" (Just don't call him !!!)